De forbudte ord

Den administrerende direktør for Tribube Co.-koncernen sætter nye standarder for sine ansattes ytringsfrihed.

Således har Randy Michaels, som chefen hedder, lavet en liste på 119 ord, som de ansatte på koncernens radio, WGN-AM, ikke må bruge.

Ved at undgå disse ord mener Michaels, at man bedre laver "down to Earth-news", som åbenbart er et adelsmærke, og han har beordret sine ansatte til at skrive tid og dato ned, hvis deres kolleger bruger et af de forbudte ord.

Hvad konsekvensen af en forglemmelse - eller et bevidst brud på etiketten - er indtil videre ukendt.

De forbudte ord er:

“Flee” meaning “run away” - “Good” or “bad” news - “Laud” meaning “praise” - “Seek” meaning “look for” - “Some” meaning “about” - “Two to one margin” . . . “Two to one” is a ratio, not a margin. A margin is measured in points. It’s not a ratio. -“Yesterday” in a lead sentence - “Youth” meaning “child” - 5 a.m. in the morning - After the break - After these commercial messages - Aftermath - All of you - Allegations - Alleged - Area residents - As expected - At risk - At this point in time - Authorities - Auto accident - Bare naked - Behind bars - Behind closed doors - Behind the podium (you mean lecturn) [sic] - Best kept secret - Campaign trail - Clash with police - Close proximity - Complete surprise - Completely destroyed, completely abolished, completely finished or any other completely redundant use - Death toll - Definitely possible - Diva - Down in (location) - Down there - Dubbaya when you mean double you - Everybody (when referring to the audience) - Eye Rack or Eye Ran - False pretenses - Famed - Fatal death - Fled on foot - Folks - Giving 110% - Going forward - Gunman, especially lone gunman - Guys - Hunnert when you mean hundred - Icon - In a surprise move - In harm’s way - In other news - In the wake of (unless it’s a boating story) - Incarcerated - Informed sources say . . . - Killing spree - Legendary - Lend a helping hand - Literally - Lucky to be alive - Manhunt - Marred - Medical hospital - Mother of all (anything) - Motorist - Mute point. (It’s moot point, but don’t say that either) - Near miss - No brainer - Officials - Our top story tonight - Out in (location) - Out there - Over in - Pedestrian - Perfect storm - Perished - Perpetrator - Plagued - Really - Reeling - Reportedly - Seek - Senseless murder - Shots rang out - Shower activity - Sketchy details - Some (meaning about) - Some of you - Sources say . . . - Speaking out - Stay tuned - The fact of the matter - Those of you - Thus - Time for a break - To be fair - Torrential rain - Touch base - Under fire - Under siege - Underwent surgery - Undisclosed - Undocumented alien - Unrest - Untimely death - Up in (location) - Up there - Utilize (you mean use) - Vehicle - We’ll be right back - Welcome back - Welcome back everybody - We’ll be back - Went terribly wrong - We’re back - White stuff - World class - You folks

// © MPH